


Nesting

by Ellenar_Ride



Series: Trope Bingo of December, '14 [1]
Category: Sherlock (TV)
Genre: Gen, Post-Reichenbach, all the feels, at least for me, mentioned past attempted suicide, trope bingo, wing!fic
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-12-03
Updated: 2014-12-03
Packaged: 2018-02-28 01:10:35
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,321
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2713421
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Ellenar_Ride/pseuds/Ellenar_Ride
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Three weeks after Reichenbach, Ace starts nesting.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Nesting

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Larahna_Steadyblade](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Larahna_Steadyblade/gifts).



She still can't bring herself to leave the flat, even though she can't bear to look at it. She spends most of her days hiding, though she isn't sure what from. She's become dependent on her landlady, a young woman named Amy, to bring her food on most days, and on the days Amy doesn't come, Ace just doesn't eat. It isn't like she's very hungry anyways.

She can't make herself cook anything anymore, either. The first time she tried, she made two places without thinking, and then hurled the plates at the wall and broke down, crying and screaming. That was when Amy started bringing her meals.

~

Mycroft comes by one afternoon, only a few days after, for reasons Ace can't fathom, and the moment he says something about her Jimmy, she punches him in the face. He leaves after that, and he doesn't come by again. He sends her some of her favorite chocolate twice a week. She hates him a little less.

~

John texts her every morning to make sure she's still alive. She tries to tell him that she won't kill herself over this, but John just reminds her that she _tried_ , the last time her Jimmy had disappeared. Every morning at seven, she gets a text that reads _“Still here, Ace?”_

Every morning she answers,  _“Still here.”_ She has a horrible feeling that the worst part of it all has yet to come.

~

She's proven right a week later. She finds a dark sweatshirt at the foot of the bed  _(Jimmy's half of the bed, she knows)_ trapped under the comforter. She buries her face in it, and she has to cry, because  _it still smells like Jimmy._ Then she absently thinks that everything in her nest will have to smell like Jimmy, and she freezes, and everything suddenly becomes a million times worse. She  _can't_ be nesting! Not when Jimmy is gone.

But she is, and she cries, and she finds Jimmy's favorite pieces of laundry, the ones that still smell like him even though they've been washed, and she builds a nest, even when it tears her apart on the inside. She wants to tell John, but something won't let her. Something whispers in her ear, in a little voice that sounds so much like Jimmy that she wants to cry, that it's a bad idea.

~

She won't eat anymore, not even when Amy brings her food and sits with her. Amy wants to know why, but Ace won't tell her.

It turns out not to matter, because a few days later, during Amy's visit, Ace finds a hair ribbon that Jimmy used to always make her wear when they went out, because he loved her in it. She takes it into the empty bedroom that used to be Jimmy's, not even noticing when Amy follows her, and adds it to her nest.

Amy stares, and then gapes, and then cries. Then she sits Ace down and makes her eat, because not eating isn't healthy.

~

She finally gets up the nerve to tell John a week later. Amy estimates she's about two months along. She picks up her phone in the early afternoon (her mind tells her that John will be at work. She tells her mind to shut it) and dials his number.

He picks up on the first ring, and he sounds surprised when he asks if she's alright. She asks him in a wobbling voice if he can come over. He promises he will and hangs up. He shows up at her door an hour later with two pounds of her favorite fudge and a gallon jug of apple cider.

She lets him in, sets his gifts on the kitchen table, and (before she loses her nerve- the not-Jimmy voice is whispering to her again about how  _stupid_ this is) leads him to the bedroom. He asks a question, but she ignores it, and opens the door.

She steps back and lets him look, and when he turns around, she thinks he looks older. Sadder, certainly.

“You're nesting,” he says, and she nods. He hugs her, and she bursts into tears.

~

John stops asking her if she's still alive every morning. Instead, he asks her how she's feeling. On the worst days, he comes by her flat and drags her out. They go to the park around the corner, most days, and sit in the sunshine.

She half believes that John is trying to convince  _both_ of them that they're still alive.

~

John was her friend, before all of this. She thinks he's her best friend, now.

~

She introduces John and Amy when they throw her a baby shower. It's a small thing, held in her living room with just the two of them and John's girlfriend Mary in attendance. They get along like a house on fire.

~

In what they estimate to be her fourth month, John takes her flying. It won't be long before it won't be safe, and she relishes in stretching her wings. Her feathers are beginning to dull, but they're still a very pretty mix of reds and grays.

John's wings are cream, white, and tan. Pale and beautiful. They're bigger than hers, too- better suited to gliding than the quick, darting movements that she prefers.

She's surprised, later, when she feels no instinctive need to move away as he picks the leaves from in between her feathers. She returns the favor when he finishes, smiling for the first time since Reichenbach.

Then she bursts into tears, and begs to go home.

~

Late in her fifth month, she's certain. She came to a conclusion when she fell asleep during a movie night with John, Amy, and Mary. She instinctively trusted John to guard her.

The next morning, she smiles and cries and hugs him, and calls him brother.

~

She no longer leaves her home, but this time it's for safety rather than despair. She's six months pregnant and it shows, and she doesn't dare risk any harm to her baby.

Amy starts bringing her groceries instead of meals, and she starts cooking again. This time she enjoys it.

~

It's late in her seventh month when she retreats to her nest and refuses to come out. Amy drops off groceries two days later, and when she doesn't see Ace, she looks in the bedroom. Ace hisses at her the moment the door opens, so she shuts it quickly, retreats to the living room, and calls John.

He shows up half an hour later. Ace lets him in the room, but not too close to her nest. She's running on pure instinct now.

~

In her last month, John decides it's easier just to stay at her place. It means not having to come by a couple times a day to get her food, and it's not like family members (and that's what John is now, blood relation or no) haven't stayed over with mate-less or widowed nesting women before.

~

She should have known, she thinks as she lies in her nest, a little baby nestled against each side.

Twins ran in her family, she was the odd one out being an only child. And Jimmy had said something about there being a lot of twins on his mother's side, hadn't he?

Twins. A boy and a girl. The girl obviously had Ace's hair, smooth and thick, and currently a dark red. She had Jimmy's nose and eyes, and Ace's small mouth. The boy, well... the boy had Jimmy's hair and her lavender eyes, and his face was mostly Ace. She couldn't wait to see their wings.

A boy, and a girl. Jasper James and Freya Mary.

She had a brother, two good friends, and now, a son and a daughter. None of them could ever replace her Jimmy, but she wasn't  _alone_ any more. She had a family.

And, it turned out, life can get better after all.

 

 

**Author's Note:**

> Clarifications, just in case they're needed.  
> 1\. Yes, even though it's pretty minor, this is a wing!fic. I really just wanted to focus on the emotions, not the wings.  
> 2\. Ace. She's an OC of mine, who was pretty good friends with both Jimmy and Sherlock growing up (it's totally my headcanon that Jimmy and Sherlock grew up near each other). Yes, she's married to Jimmy- she did, however, keep her maiden name, because she's very attached to it.  
> 3\. Yes, Ace did basically adopt John as her brother. He adopted her right back. It's complicated.  
> 4\. I choose to believe that Ace's landlady is Amy Pond from Doctor Who. It wasn't intended to be, but it's hysterical.
> 
> Alright, I think that's it.


End file.
